..Priti Hostility..

Lovely and Dejected

Thu, 02 Jul 2009 04:23:46 GMT

How can I be so polar in emotion?
What do I do to make you
believe in this
believe in something
believe in me?

You've got me wanting your attention
Am I playing your game?
I'm waiting for your responses
As if my life depends on it
You have the ability to fill my life with beautiful words
But once you've hit "send" does it mean anything to you?

"I won't lie, you're a pretty rad person and I will admit I do have feelings for you"
Feelings.... for once, those are involved in decisions...
This feels like the right choice
But I have to wait...
Good things are always worth the wait....

Just say the word, but until then
I'll be waiting...

Tue, 30 Jun 2009 05:18:40 GMT

The things that you've said,
I have kept them close
locked away
waiting for a rainy day
those words mean a lot
when I felt like i was worth nothing
you picked me up and carried me away
for this i thank you.
the pieces seem to fit together so perfectly
but I'm not sure what to do..
do i say something?
do i wait?
do i forget it all and walk away?

give me a hint
i'm clueless, useless, and a waste of breath, of space, of time...

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 22:54:07 GMT

1. What time did you get up this morning?
9:30.

2. Diamonds or pearls?
neither

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
The Hangover

4. What is your favorite TV show?
I dont watch much TV

5. What do you usually have for breakfast?
nothing really.

6. What is your middle name
Nilisha

7. What food do you dislike?
anything with eggplant blehhh

8. What is your favourite CD at the moment?
Jack's Mannequin - everything in transit

9. What kind of car do you drive?
2000 VW GTI <3333 his name is rupert.

10. Favourite sandwich?
Veggie sandwich from anywhere =)

11. What characteristic do you despise?
Arrogance

12. Favourite item of clothing?
Skinny jeans

13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go?
Europe... everywhere in europe

14. Favourite brand of clothing?
anything that looks good.

15. Where would you retire to?
australia

16. What was your most recent memorable birthday?
this year at the hop til 2am

17. Favourite sport to watch?
no idea...

18. What are you currently reading?
Twilight for the hundreth time

20. When is your birthday?
January 18

21. Are you a morning person or a night person?
both

22. What is your shoe size?
8 1/2

23. Pets?
fishies 2

24. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us?
nopeee

25. What did you want to be when you were little?
Artist

26. How are you today?
uhmmm good.

27. What is your favourite candy?
chocolate.

28. What is your favourite flower?
roses

29. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to?
none in particular

31. What are you listening to right now?
commercials

32. What was the last thing you ate?
ice cream

33. Do you wish on stars?
No

35. How is the weather right now?
sunny 22

36. The first person you spoke to on the phone today?
nobody

37. Favourite soft drink?
none

38. Favourite restaurant?
cactus club. mmmmmm

39. Real hair colour?
black

40. What was your favourite toy as a child?
puzzles

41. Summer or winter?
Fall

42. Hugs or kisses?
Kisses.

43. Chocolate or Vanilla?
Chocolate.

44. Coffee or tea?
Tea

45. Do you want your friends to email you back?
sure

46. When was the last time you cried?
a while ago

47. What is under your bed?
keyboard, telescope and junk.

48. What did you do last night?
sleep

49. What are you afraid of?
spiders, heights, being alone

50. Salty or sweet?
sweet

Fri, 05 Jun 2009 05:46:03 GMT

I'd give you everything, but i have nothing left.

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 17:53:35 GMT

I've made many mistakes this week.
I've seen a flash of memories,
I've seen his face smeared across my mind.
I made a big mistake.
Here's to wishing I could take back the last time I saw you

There you were with your cute little hat, sunglasses and cropped jeans
you gave me the best hug ever....
and I fell all over again
i knew it was wrong
I was so wrong to think we were here for a reason
on the way back home,
so many thoughts rushing through my mind
and next thing i knew, my head was thrown against the steering wheel.

what have i done?
where am i now?
who do I call?
what do i do?

the guilt will last a while
the fear will last longer
but the pain is here forever
It was all wrong

My world is upside down and I have nothing left to give.
I'm alone, and you're nothing but lonely.

Never again will I play my hopes up like this.
Never again will I admit how much I care for you.
Never again.

Sat, 23 May 2009 04:03:32 GMT

i guess i got what i wanted
no more options...
both doors have closed so im stuck laying down on linoleum flooring
looking up and hoping for the sky to fall down on me
this isnt as comfortable as sleeping in someone's arms and dreaming of hapiness
but its all that i have, so i try to make the best of it.

today consisted of test drives, texts, facebook messages, tears and taking back sunday.
makes me realize that i was wrong about you all along, just as i ran up to the door with intentions of opening it,
and it banged shut in my face.
oh, what a lovely feeling this is...

can the sky please just fall down already?

grand prize or demise?

Wed, 20 May 2009 02:12:22 GMT

door one or two.
what is the price of this decision?
will i lose one, will i lose both?

Door One
we're spent hours together, we met on pure interests and attraction
we're close friends, we are alike in most ways
I wasn't pretty enough...
we grew apart, he hurt me, and i gave up
he realized his mistakes, he shows more interest,
we're growing back together, but what now?
forget the past?....

Door Two
we've talked for a while now, we share an appreciation of music
and an understanding of culture
he is sensitive, funny, cute and a talented singer
he has a clear idea of what he wants
he knows how to treat a lady
dancing, picnics and ice cream out of town...
but what do i do?

door one, or door two...
equal opportunity behind each
but equal amounts of failure
no matter what door i chose,
i may end up absolutely miserable
the decision is making me want to jump out the window
but what do you do when door one is unsure
and door two is too sure
and silly old me is confused.

can i ask the audience?

Sun, 26 Apr 2009 06:47:00 GMT

I called your name
and you appeared
kissed your neck
and kept you near

blinked my eyes
and you were gone
seems that everything
somehow went wrong

how could i be so blind?

this empty space beside me
yeah, it used to be yours
I'm not one to dwell
so im locking up that door
you missed the chance, the time has passed
i could have been the best you'd ever have

played me like a game
caressing my hips
oh and my name
no, it was never on your lips

missed me, missed me
you can kiss my ass
tricked me, tricked me
but thats all in the past
do you miss me, miss me?

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 19:23:22 GMT

my ribs and hipbones are bruised,
superego = confused
everything in theory plays out differently in practice
proving that you played me for a little bit of action
i was just another tool in your game
you were a fool to think i'd put up with it
i turn the lights down low, so you know i mean business.

you didn't know how bad you beat me
until i spoke up
i felt as though payment was necessary

i wanted to spend time with your mind
you wanted time with my body
which you beat up and bruised
left it lifeless on your mattress
causing endless pain, tears and bleeding
to you, I am just a body
to you, I am a nobody
to you, I meant nothing

to you - good riddance.

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 02:33:43 GMT

Say something to the first person you kissed this year:
please get your head on straight.

When was the last time you were truly and completely happy?
a few weeks ago.
Last night, did you go to sleep smiling?
i wish

Last compliment you received?
i dont remember.

What are you thinking about right now?
how i wish i could fight.

Has the opposite sex ever sang to you?
sang AT me, yes.

Do you think you are a good person?
no.

What's a song that describes your love life right now?
you're gone - something corporate.

Do you break things when you are mad?
no. i make fists.

Do your parents really know you?
not the real me.

Why do you like the person you currently have feelings for?
i dont know anymore.

Is it okay to kiss people if your single?
yup.

Do you believe your ex thinks about you?
no.

Did you speak to your father today?
yup.

Who has the ability to hurt you most?
boys and parents.

Are you starting to realize anything?
i guess so...

What would you do if you got someone pregnant?
... if that were possible id be weirded out.

What were you doing at 8 this morning?
sleep

Who do you love?
everyone.

How did you feel when you woke up today?
a mess.

Your ex shows up randomly at your house, you say?
"what do you want?"

Does it take a lot to make you cry?
it really depends on the situation

Who were you with last night around 9:00 PM?
driving around.

Where is your brother right now?
non-existant

Your best friend dies, what do you do?
i dont know what i'd do, there would be a lot of crying involved.

What is one thing you would love to happen tomorrow?
no overcast and the snow disappears.

What is your phone a flip or slide?
flip.

Do you bite your fingernails?
sometimes

Do you like Mexican food?
depends.

Did anyone see you kiss the last person you kissed?
nope.

What are you looking forward to in the next month?
getting my license and a job.

What did you do today?
sleep, eat, clean, laundry.

Everything happens for a reason?
yes.

Does anyone call you baby?
only kenzie to annoy the fuck out of me.

Do you want someone back in your life?
of course.

Do you think you will be in a relationship three months from now?
i dont know it all depends

Have you ever wanted something you couldn't have?
every single day of my life.

Have you ever in anyway, been betrayed by someone you trust?
yes.

Do you find it in your heart to forgive?
always.

At what age do you want to get married?
21-27. after 27 its arranged marriagge time.

Do you like snakes?
oh jeez no.

Has anyone ever mistaken you for a family member on the phone?
all the time.

If all your friends went on a road trip would you go too?
i would want to but my parents are nazis

Who's the last person you talked to on the phone?
megan

Is there a high chance of you going out to the movies soon?
nope.

Have you ever kissed someone and never saw them again?
no.

When was the last time something bothered you?
now.

Where were you at two this morning?
sleeping....

Have you ever stayed in a hotel?
yes miss.

Do you carry an umbrella when it rains, or just put up your hood?
umbrellas they suck though.

Who was last to cook for you?
my mom.

When was the last time you laughed REALLY hard?
today when the blender exploded all over me.

Are you wearing a necklace, who got it for you?
no im not.

Are there some songs you can't listen to because they remind you of someone/something?
yes indeed.

Could you go a day without eating?
yup.

Are you in college?
yes miss.

What's the next vacation you're going on?
uhmm... i think san fran... im undecided, maybe van city.

Where do you go when you need to just get away?
i hide at home or go to san fran.

Who is the one person you can always turn to?
megan and kenzie

Have you ever sang in front of a large audience?
nah.

Who woke you up this morning?
nobody.

Have you ever had a pet fish?
yes

Is there a message saved on your inbox?
a few.

How many jobs do you have?
0

Who do you not get along with?
nobody really, i try to get along with everyone.

Who is your last missed call from?
megan... phonetag

How many true friends do you have that you can tell anything to?
around 5-7

Who do you call when your having a bad day?
nobody usually. or megan if i really need to talk to someone

Have you ever had to pull over on the side of the road to puke?
once. haha.

Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex?
yep!

Name two people that made you smile today.
i didnt see anybody today

It's 4 in the morning, and your phone rings.. and?
i pick up incase its important

Where was your default picture taken?
at home

Do you watch The Hills?
occasionally.

What do you currently hear right now?
the cool kids - gold and a pager

What’s your favourite thing to have on your bed?
someone to snuggle with.

Who would be the first person to know if you got pregnant?
megan

Where did you last sleep?
my room

Who was the last person you were in a car with?
mom

Is there someone on your mind that shouldn't be?
yes.

Do you care what others think about you?
sometimes.

Do you think you'll be married in 10 years?
i hope so.

Did you have a good day?
nah.

When was the last time you got flowers?
never...

Do you plan on moving in the next year?
i wish.

Where did you get the shirt you are wearing?
bluenotes.

Do you think you're ready to take care of a baby?
hell no

How late did you stay up last night?
10pm. hah.

Suppose you see your crush kissing another person?
be upset but move on.

Tue, 21 Apr 2009 01:59:53 GMT

“if you don’t like being hurt then please don’t stay, if you don’t like being hurt, then get away…”

I spend my time with you, hoping that perhaps we’ll get a chance to work this out. I did everything I could to keep you close, but this has pushed me over the edge. I can’t take the pain of this anymore, so I’m done and I’m leaving you, but you won’t be leaving me. This is the only solution for making the pain subside.

The grass is turning green, the sun is out, and sometimes you need something to counterbalance the good things in life, this is what I am about to do. I’m cutting you away to get some equality. You’ve broken me in ways I didn’t know was possible, you’ve beat me and left me on the curb. I am cheap, I may be ugly and I am worthless but I am not yours and I am not weak.

The tears may escape from my eyes from time to time, and this is for the loss of who I thought you were. I thought you were genuine and interested, you tried to change me. I thought you were caring and considerate, you just wanted some action. I thought you and me would be, you are going to miss me. Until our paths cross some day, this is goodbye, forever.

Never do this to anyone again,
-Priti.

Sat, 18 Apr 2009 07:11:03 GMT

It seems to me that I'm all dressed up and there's nowhere to go
the lights are on but there's nobody home
I'm over trying to make this work
I'm hoping that soon you realize what you're missing
I'm over it completely
but I'm still not over you
annoyed with your hot and cold ways
changes all the time, always
stick to one story and run it
im sick of all these loose ends and half written stories
teach me something
keep me wanting more
right now, i dont want to deal with you....

fix this.

Sun, 12 Apr 2009 17:33:47 GMT

f you had to…

1. If you HAD to get a tattoo, where would you get it?
ANYWHERE! love love love

2. If you HAD to dye your hair a color what color would it be?
Dark Brown

3. If you HAD to get a piercing (THAT ISN’T YOUR EARS) what would youu pierce?
Labret, Dimple, Nose...

4. If you HAD to change your name, what new name would you choose?
Nilisha

Would you…

1. Would you rather love one person or have many short relationships?
ONE MANG

2. Would you move anywhere else if you could?
I would most definitely love to move to New York

3. If you were given the chance to go to Paris, would you go?
DERR

4. If you were given 10 million dollars to keep, what would you do?
Pay my loans off, pay for the rest of my school, buy new camera gear, save the rest, have some funnnn!!!!!!!

Let’s say..

3. Let’s say you had to eat a live tarantula for $1,000…would you?
only one grand??? UHHH NO!

4. Let’s say you could star in any movie (made or in the works) what movie?
Kill Bill, Charlies Angels, any with kick ass girls.

Other stuff..

1. What makes your bedroom unique?
photography everywhere.

4. What’s your favorite season of the year?
Spring // Fall

5. Do you like cheese?
DO I EVER!!!!!!

1. Have you had your birthday yet?
Yes 19 times.

2. Are you the same person as you were at the beginning of 2008?
Some similarties, many differences.

3. Are you still in the same job?
HAH nope!

4. Is your favorite color the same color?
Im too indecisive to have a favourite

5. Have you got the same style/color hair?
same colour not the style.

6. Have you bought a NEW car this year?
Nope, cant drive

7. Anything exciting happen this year?
YEP!

8. Have you been involved with the police this year?
no, thank goodness, they scare me.

10. Is your best friend still your best friend?
yesh

11. Got any tattoos or piercings this year?
yup

12. Had a haircut this year?
once

13. Been in a hospital this year?
nope

15. Been on a vacation this year ?
nope =(

16. Been kicked out of a public place this year?
nope.

Do you…

• lick yourself: No
• whine a lot: nah
• yell a lot: for emphasis
• want to die: sometimes
• wear dark colors: yuuup
• dye your hair: nopeeee

Have you ever…

• worn rainbow: npe
• talked on the phone for over 3 hours: Yes
• flashed anyone: Nope
• stolen something: back in the day
• caught something on fire: nah

Last person…

• you talked to: mom
• you hugged: uhmmm karl iguess
• you called: megan
• to call you: megan

Next person…

• you’ll talk to: mom
• you’ll hug: nobody =(
• you’ll call: megan
• you’ll get a call from: megan

Back to basics

• what is your birth name? Priti Nilisha Sharma
• what is your birthday day? 18
• how tall are you?: 5'2
• shoe size?: 8.5
• brothers/sisters?: 1
• favorite colour? currently, black (yeah its a shade w/e)
• soda? none
• ice cream?: cookies and creammmm

In the last 48 hours…

• cried?: nah
• missed someone?: yes
• yelled at someone?: nope
• been online: yes
• kissed someone?: yes
• hugged someone?: yes
• last thing you ate?: carrot mufin
• talked to someone about something important? yes

Finally..

• who is sitting next to you? mom
• favorite sport?: pool - yes its a sport lol
• been in a plane?: yes
• broke someones heart?: nope never plan to
• kicked your cat for the hell of it? i dont have one soooo NOPE

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 20:55:27 GMT

I wish it didn't have to be like this
I dont feel anything anymore
when I look like im about to break
will you care?
you're pushing me off the edge
feeling so cheap and used
i quit my bad habits in hopes of getting something in return
now im lost, alone, and i have only this to keep me sane.

where have you been?
you wanted me to change who i was... so i did.
whats left to burn?

21.0
115

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 08:37:33 GMT

so sorry, its over...

oh well, im used to it.

Wed, 08 Apr 2009 03:01:58 GMT

YES OR NO:

1. Have you had any relationships this year? Yes

2. Have you had your birthday yet? Yup

3. Drank Starbucks? This year? yes.

4. Went Camping?
Nopeeee

5. Met someone special? Yeah, pretty much.

6. Been out of country? Nope

7. What are you thinking about? Having a phone conversation

8. How many people have you gotten into a fight with this year? One, but its sorted out.

HAVE YOU:
1,) Hugged someone? Yeah

2.) Slept in someone else's bed? Nappies, yea.

3.) Got a job? Nopeee

4.) Loaned out money? a few bucks

5.) Gotten in a car accident? nope

6.) Gone over your mobile phone bill?
yes!!!!

7.) Been called a bitch? all the time

8.) Done something you regret? yesh

LASTS:
Last person you hugged? Karl

Last person to call you? Megan

When was the last time you felt stupid? pretty much every day

Who did you last yell at? no idea

What did you do today? got drunk at the gate with some kids

NINE FACTS :
01. Natural hair color? blackkkk

02. Initials? PNS

04. Eye color? brown

05. Height: 5'2

06. Pets: fishies

07. Mood: bored

08. Where would you rather be? anywhere with karl

9. What was the last thing you drank? waterrrr

NINE THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE:

01. Have you ever been in love: no
02. do you believe in love? i have my days

03. Why did your LAST relationship fail? different interests

04. Have you ever been heartbroken: meh, it hurt but not broken stuff

05. Have you broken someones heart? Not a chance

06. Have you ever fallen for your best friend? yup.

07. Have you ever liked someone but never told them? haha nope, i always tell them

08. Are you afraid of commitment? kind of

09. Have you been in more than 5 serious relationships? Nope

EMOTIONS

01. Are you missing someone right now?
little bit

02. Are you happy? i sure am

03. Are you eating anything? nanner

04. Do you like someone right now?
i like everyone

05. If you could have anything, what would it be? audi a4?

FIRSTS:

1. Who was your first prom date? i never had a prom date

2. Do you still talk to your first love? n/a

3. What was your first alcoholic drink? vodka and sprite
4. What was your first job? wendy's
5. What was your first car? the bus

6. Who was the first person to text you today? karl

7. Who is the first person you thought of this morning? me and my hair. lol

8. Who was your second grade teacher? ms. dash i think was her name

9. Where did you go on your first ride on an airplane? denver

10. When you snuck out of your house for the first time, who was it with? i dont sneak

12. Where was your first sleep over? guy or girl? ecs best friends house =)

13. Who was the first person you talked to today? mommy

14. Whose wedding were you in the first time? uhm... Sanjel's

15. What was the first thing you did this morning? brush dem teef

16. What was the first concert you ever went to? HAHAHHAHAH... to embarassing

17. First tattoo or piercing? ears at one, tattoo last june.

18. First foreign country you went to? fiji

19. Who was the last girl/guy you kissed? Karl.
20. When was your first detention? Grade 9

21. What was the first province you lived in? Alberta mang

22. Who was the first person to really break your heart? Nobody

23. Who was your first roommate? N/A

The Bucket List

Fri, 20 Mar 2009 21:33:36 GMT

Things you have done during your lifetime:
( ) Gone on a blind date
(x) Skipped school
( ) Watched someone die
( ) Watched someone be born
(x) Been to Canada
( ) Been to Mexico
( ) Been to Europe
( ) Been to Asia
( ) Been to South America
(x) Been to Australia
( ) Been to Africa
( ) Been to Antarctica
( ) Been north of the Arctic Circle
(x) Crossed the Equator
( ) Been to Florida
( ) Been to Hawaii
(X) Been on a plane
( ) Been on a helicopter
(x) Been lost
( ) Gone to Washington, DC
(x) Swam in the ocean
(x) Cried yourself to sleep
( ) Played cops and robbers
(x) Played Frisbee golf
( ) Recently colored with crayons
( ) Skipped stones more than seven skips at a time
(X) Sang Karaoke
( ) Paid for a meal with coins only
( ) Been to the top of the St. Louis Arch
(x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't
( ) Made prank phone calls
( ) Been down Bourbon Street in New Orleans
(x) Crossed the San Francisco Bay Bridge
( ) Strolled the River Walk in San Antonio, Texas
( ) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(x) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
( ) Sat in a hot-tub while snow flakes fell in your hair
( ) Danced in the rain
(x) Written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(x) Been visited by the Tooth Fairy
( ) Watched the sunrise with someone
(x) Blown bubbles
(x) Gone ice-skating
(x) Gone to the movies
( ) Gone snorkelling
( ) Been deep sea fishing
( ) Been in a cave
( ) Driven across the United States
( ) Been in a hot air balloon
( ) Been sky diving -
(x) Ridden a roller coaster
( ) Gone snowmobiling
(x) Driven a go-cart or a race car
( ) Lived in more than one country
(x) Camped in a tent when I was young and didn't value a warm, soft bed
(x) Laid down outside at night and admired the stars while listening to the crickets
(x) Seen a falling star and made a wish
(x) Bought or sold something on eBay
( ) Enjoyed the beauty of Old Faithful Geyser
( ) Skied in the Rocky Mountains
( ) Seen the Statue of Liberty
( ) Climbed to the top of the Statue of Liberty
( ) Gone to the top of Seattle Space Needle
( ) Been to the top of the Empire State Building
( ) Climbed to the top of a mountain
( ) Sunbathed topless
( ) Seen a Broadway show
( ) Spent New Years Eve in Times Square
( ) Been on a cruise
( ) Traveled by train
( ) Traveled by motorcycle
(x) Been horse back riding
( ) Took the ferry to Martha's Vineyard
( ) Ridden on a San Francisco CABLE CAR
( ) Visited Kittyhawk, North Carolina
( ) Scratched one of Hemmingway's cats in Key West
(x) Been to Disneyland OR Disney World
( ) Truly believe in the power of prayer
( ) Been in a rain forest
( ) Seen whales in the ocean
( ) Been to Niagara Falls
( ) Ridden on an elephant
( ) Ridden on a camel
( ) Swam with dolphins
( ) Been to the Olympics
( ) Walked on the Great Wall of China
( ) Seen Lenin in his Red Square Tomb
( ) Walked under the Acropolis in Athens
( ) Tossed a coin into the Trevi Fountain
( ) Walked past the bookshelf into Anne Frank's secret annex
( ) Yodelled in the Swiss Alps
( ) Been to Westminster Abbey
( ) Been to the Louvre
( ) Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower
( ) Been to the Colloseum in Rome
( ) Swam in the Mediterranean
( ) Saw and heard a glacier calf
( ) Watched the start or the finish of the Iditarod
( ) Seen the Aurora Borealis
( ) Been spinnaker flying
( ) Been sailing
( ) Been water-skiing
(x) Been snow-skiing
( ) Been to a professional soccer game
( ) Been to a Major League Baseball game
( ) Been to a National Football League game
( ) Watched your team win a national championship
( ) Been on a tv show

27. FAIL. hahaha.

** Results May Vary

Sun, 15 Mar 2009 05:07:04 GMT

I gave up looking, and here it appears
I have no desire, just me and my fears
Where did you come from? Why are you here?
Not right now, don't come any nearer....
-----------

Causing disturbance to these still waters.
Peacefully holding myself together
Right now I don't need a hand
I'm pulling myself together
No, you don't understand
I'm piecing myself together
Walk away while you can
Its such a mess to clean up
Don't dirty your hands
Its such a mess to clean up
no you don't understand
Its such a mess to clean up
no you dont understand
such a mess to clean up
its such a mess to clean up...

I apologize....

Fri, 13 Mar 2009 22:20:16 GMT

The vine of anxiety is creeping around me,
wrapping its spindly self around my neck,
in through my ears and slowly suffocating my mind
can't you see its hard for me to breathe?

The simplest of comments have been taken the wrong way (like "sorry, he wouldn't date you")
I lost the will to eat, I'm afraid, I'm lost, I'm alone
And little do you know...
So little...

So go ahead and say what you need to
Leave me with nothing, Let me rot
This is my addiction
And rehab is not an option...

Watch me crumble.

122.0

procrastination station

Sat, 07 Mar 2009 03:15:24 GMT

STEP ONE:
– Name: Priti Nilisha Sharma
– Birth date: Jan 18
– Nickname: N/A
– Eye Color: Darkest brown ever
– Hair Color: black as heck
– Zodiac Sign: Capricorn

STEP TWO:
–The shoes you wore today: adidas superstar
– Your weaknesses: chocolate, strength, and emotion
– Your fear(s): heights, bugs, spiders, debt.
- Your perfect pizza: anything veggie and spicy as heck
– Goal you’d like to achieve: pay off student loans ASAP

STEP THREE:
– Your best physical feature: Eyes
– Your bedtime? anytime
– Most missed memory? None.

STEP FOUR:
This Or That…
– Pepsi or Coke? Neither
– McDonald’s or Burger King: Neither
– Adidas or Nike: Adidas
– Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Nestea
– Chocolate or Vanilla: CHOCOLATE
– Cappuccino or coffee: Coffee... or espresso

STEP FIVE:
Do You…
– Curse: yes, mostly at school
– Sing: yes
– Dance: yeeeee
– Take a shower everyday: usually
– Have a crush: nope
– Do you think you’ve been in love?: not now, not ever
– Want to go to college: in it, yo.
– Like(d) high school: hated every minute.
– Want to get married: not anymore
– Get motion sickness: nope
– Think you’re a health freak: uhmmm depends
– Get along with your parents: yes, as long as i listen to them.

STEP SIX:
In the past month…
– Gone to the mall: yes
– Eaten an entire box of Oreos: thats disgusting
– Eaten Sushi: Yes with my dear Sarah =)
– Been on stage: no
– Gone skating: no
– Made homemade cookies: yes
– Gone Skinny dipping: never
– Stolen anything: nope

STEP SEVEN:
Ever…
– Played a game that required removal of clothing: ummm NEVER
– If so, was it mixed company: n/a
- Flashed anyone: nope
– Been beaten up: nope
– Shoplifted: yeeee...

STEP EIGHT:
– Age you hope to be married: uhm 27 or never
– Numbers of Children: none that come out of me, thanks.
– Describe your Dream Wedding: messed up and fun, big party
– What country would you most like to visit? anywhere but here.

STEP NINE:
In the opposite sex..
– Best eye color?: blue
– Best hair color?: any
– Short hair or long hair?: whatever looks good.
– Height: doesnt matter.

STEP TEN:
– Number of people I could trust with my life: none
– Number of CDs that I own: too many to count
– Number of tattoos: 6
– Number of piercings: 4

-Who were you with yesterday? my class.
-What woke you up this morning? alarm
-Where are you? home
-Is tomorrow going to be a good day? Nope, everyday is a crap day!
-Do you like anybody? Nope, not interested.

THE PAST
-Ever thrown up in public? Hello art history...
-Passed out because of alcohol? No, but thrown up because of it.
-What’s on your mind RIGHT NOW? foood.
-What kind of home would you like? small place with a studio basement.
-What do you want to be when you grow up? Fashion Photographer or tattoo artist.
-Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Starting to work at a shitty job to pay off my loans until i get an awesome photo career.

IN GENERAL
-Do you like candy necklaces? No
-When was the last time you fell over or ran into something? this morning.
-Do you listen to music every day? yes
-Do you still go trick or treating? Negatron Megatron
-What was the last thing you ate? spinach
-Are you a fast typer? decently
-What’s your favorite type of soda? None.
-Have you ever moved? yup
-Have you ever won an award? A few.
-Are you listening to music right now? Showbread, fool!
-How long ’till your birthday? 10
-When were you the saddest in your whole life? my birthday this year.
-What time is it? 803pm
-Do you use ebay to buy or sell? Buy camera gear
-Who makes you mad? people who are consistently tardy or only talk about themselves.
-Have you ever heard a song written about you? yes it was sung at me.
-Something you want to happen in 2009? get inspired and pay off some loans.
-Summer 2009? get a decent job and going to san fran as per usual.

HONESTY SECTION
1. Honestly, what color is your underwear? black
2. Honestly, what’s on your mind? life
3. Honestly, what are you doing right now? listening to some tunes
6. Honestly, have you done something bad today? got frustrated with my mom when she couldnt find my birth certificate
8. Honestly, who is the last person you talked to on the phone? ...No idea, i dont use my phone
9. Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now? Many people.
10. Honestly, what makes you mad most of the time? TARDINESS
11. Honestly, do you bite your nails? Not a chance
12. Honestly, have you had an eating disorder? disordered eating maybe
13. Honestly, do you want to see someone this very moment? Not a chance
14. Honestly, are you keeping a big secret now? from some
15. Honestly, do you have a friend you don’t actually like? No, i dont keep those
17. Honestly, are you in denial? who isnt?
18. Honestly, do you get up in the middle of the night and eat? No.
19. Honestly, do you like anyone? Negatron
20. Honestly, does anyone like you? Negatron

ANGER SECTION
1. What do you do when you’re mad? say nothing and storm off teary eyed
2. What’s the worst thing you’ve done when you were mad? end friendships
3. Ever made anyone cry when you were mad? nope.
4. Do you swear when you’re mad? ohhhh yeahhh

CRYING SECTION
1.When was the last time you actually cried? yesterday
2. Ever cried yourself to sleep? yes
3. Do certain songs make you cry? no, thats lame
4. What usually makes you cry? anger, frustration, emotional stress

HAPPY SECTION
1. Are you usually a happy person? I'm indifferent
2. What makes you the happiest? success
4. Do you believe in yourself? I try to.
5. When people say they think you are good looking/pretty, do you get happy? I get uncomfortable and know that they're lying.

1, What colour is your toothbrush? white

2, Name one person that made you smile today? Austin

3, What were you doing at 8 am this morning? at the passport office thing.

4, What were you doing 45 minutes ago? facebooking

5, What is your favourite candy? none

6, Have you ever been to a strip club? not a chance

7, What is the last thing you said aloud? "UGHHH!!!"

8, What is the best ice cream flavour? cookies and cream

9, What was the last thing you had to drink? an entire bottle of water in 5 minutes.

10, What is the longest you have gone without sleep? 46 hours

11, Have you ever made a promise you'd die to keep? nope

12, Have you bought any new clothing items this week? no

13, The last sporting event you watched? pool like a month ago

14, What is your favourite flavour of popcorn? plain, no fat

15, Who is the last person you sent a message on facebook? Artlife

16, Ever go camping? I'm not very outdoorsy

17, Do you take vitamins daily? Not anymore, I should though.

18, Do you go to church every Sunday? PFFT no!

19,Do you have a tan? year round, fool!

20, Do you like Chinese food over pizza? No

21, Do you drink your pop with a straw? dont drink it.

22, What did your last message on facebook say? "busy tonight? come down to artlife"

23, What are you doing tomorrow? Homework and cleaning the house, baking something probably.

24, Where is your dad? basement.

25, Look to your left, what do you see? Wall

26, What colour is your watch? red with teal and robots

27, What do you think of when you hear Australia? my trip there.

28, What is the color of you birthstone? garnet

29, Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? neither

30, What is your favourite number? 18

31, Who's the last person you talked to on the phone? No idea.

32, Any plans today? sleep

33, How many states have you lived in? 1

34, Biggest annoyance in your life right now? AHIS paper

35, Last station you listened to? 98.5

36,Can you say the alphabet backwards? if i think really hard

37, Do you have a maid service clean your house? Uhhmmm, no, do that shit yourself!

Fuck it

Wed, 21 Jan 2009 03:40:03 GMT

I never meant anything to either one of you.
but life is more fun when you don't give a shit.

Tue, 13 Jan 2009 04:21:46 GMT

Lets state this again: "Always the friend, never the girl friend" I have coined the term "bro ho."
I'm one of the guys, never looked at under any other light.
Figures...
I was silly to think that I could ever mean anything more to anyone
I guess I'll settle for this, what choice do i have?

Thu, 08 Jan 2009 01:25:54 GMT

These days I see the words I've always wanted to flash across my phone screen
"Awh, thats no good, I won't be able to make you party [when you're sick] so i was thinking I could take you out to buy a movie or take you out to one"
but im not satisfied. Isn't this what i wanted?

I just wish I could be normal...

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 07:51:11 GMT

"what is so wrong with me that you can't love me?"

Why is it that when I need friends the most, they disappear
Why is it that when I tell people the problem, they choose to ignore it

Why is it that I'm never good enough?

.....Because I'm not.

Mon, 29 Dec 2008 09:40:45 GMT

Bitter emptiness.
Absolute disgust.